Portfolio

In relation to my last post, I've made a portfolio site, something to keep me going perhaps.

CLICK HERE

Transmissions.

I'm here staring at myself at the mirror and just going deep into my own eyes.

What have I done till now ? What have I done to make a name for myself ?

Nothing.

It's a really crappy feeling you get when you have opportunities floating up and bursting right in your face, mocking and teasing you as they die out.

When you're all alone on your bed thinking about the future you and hoping he would be a jolly old man living a good life, perhaps a good partner, perhaps a good kid. Perhaps...living life.

But for now I just see myself in a shell, looking at the dark walls that surround me and the blue glowing rectangle place upon wood at the location I confine myself in at home.

Everyday just seems like a 2 way highway to me, I just need that bit of help that broken down cars get at the side of the road, something, somebody, some of it.

As for now, I'll just think for a while, perhaps I'm writing this while my real self is sleeping inside me, dying to awake one day to be somebody great.

I want you back.

I just watched a show called pushing daisies and I so wish I had the power to bring you back to life, even if it meant I couldn't touch you, hug you or hi5 you again for eternity, at least the others would be able to....You made me so happy in a time where I thought I was so alone in the world + you introduced me to weird bunch-o-crazy people.

I so wish fairytales did exist....I feel as if a part of my life has just walked away but whatever it takes, I'll still live it....There's not a single day where I don't think about you. You're in my head.

I know people go, I didn't think you would go this early. I feel lost again Harshi...
I don't know why I'm so rationalistic, I wish I wasn't so but I can't help it..I still keep that little hope in me that I'll find that answer I'm looking for..and hope I see you again.

You're not just some one who left, you're a part of me. You will always be a part of me. Forever.

love you Harshi...

Harshini Poonja(1991-2010)

Gone.

Sometimes I think,
Before I'd go, I'd want to make everyone happy and set everything straight.

I don't care if I didn't reach my goals...
I don't care if I didn't have a girl friend.

I don't care if I wasn't rich.

I'd go, happy. Maybe, I'd be sad for a while, but maybe I wouldn't feel anything because theres nothing to feel. But yeah, set everything straight.

I'll go.

Someone Important.

Whatever you want....:)

Something.

Nothing beats going back into the past eh ?

Nothing like checking out the old numbers and scribbles on the wall, and the old posters and stickers...

Nothing like a good early morning Kuwait breakfast with cheese, eggs and tea.
Nothing like the amazing weather out here...

Nothing like saying hello to your dad and sister after a long time....

Nothing like sleeping in your own den with the most amazing fluffy blanket ever....

Nothing like walking into your house and finding out you have a nice white fluffy dog....
..Nothing...

This place has such a chilled out lazy atmosphere..... <3

Wings.

Yay ! I'm going on a plane......=_-

Mood : You know that feeling you get when you are 5 minutes away from getting your Board Exam Results and your heart is in your mouth ?

Anywhoo....

I'll just have to trust the Pilot ! I'm guessing he has gone through every possible crappy situation, even aliens invading the plane.

Harshi please watch over me !! I love you &lt;3&nbsp;
I LOVE YOU HARSHI !!! &lt;3 &lt;3 &lt;3

Going to Kuwait...

Yep, I'm off to Kuwait for a week.....Hopefully a week is also Ramadan holidays..

Goal.

Make everyone around me happy before I go....

What is it ?

I'm scared....I look around me and all I see are black walls, monolithic. What do they stand for ? I don't know but I do know they have a haunting presence.

My refuge.

Lost.

God (if he does exist) has abandoned me.

I can't find the answers and its getting tiring.

I find myself in an empty void, like a black ocean with me in the middle of it on a boat where there is nothing but water.

I feel this feeling every night and maybe its the music I'm listening to right now, but I feel it, it resonates.

Harshi,

You are one of those people I would never forget in my life..

Give me a sign..

I beg you.

The Black Eyed Peas......

Free Spirit.

You are awesome ! And will be awesome forever...I'll make sure my kids know about you ! I'll try my best to keep everyone together :3 !!!

I owe you, I owe you big time. You own me when I die...I promise.

Things.

Feel.

Feel ?

I felt a lot of things today. A wave of negativity and a white wall. I don't seem to be happy around here and I don't know why. This place just feels like a card-board to me and I wasting my college life here, I really feel that I am.

The assignments took a toll on my sleep and now I'm partial insomniac and after I submitted my assignment, I went into BLAH mood where I found myself staring blankly at the switched off laptop on my table and my poster.All grumpy and shit.

I have friends here, I'm not saying I don't, but getting to those friends are either hampered by time, college or some other bullshit. The only friend that sticks with me are my headphones.

My headphones are an expression of "GO FUCK YOURSELF ! " to the world, its one of the things I never leave my house without. Lot of things happened these past months and it seems time just flew by in a blink of an eye.

Maybe life is trying to teach me something here, but I can't quite understand it and the very fact I can't understand it annoys me. I don't know what to do or try anymore, my life is just college/computer/sleep thats fucking all.

Maybe I'll click pictures of the nice things I find here, maybe I'll find someone to love again, maybe I'll fix my insomnia, maybe....

Anyways goodnight....I don't even think anyone reads this...but goodnight...

Goodnight Harshi, you look beautiful as ever, I hope you're watching over all of us, and I hope there is really an afterlife....I miss you..

Useful Widgets for mac...

While surfing across the web I found something useful to all you mac users out there..

Here are some very useful social widgets that gets the job done instantly.

Useful Widgets

Omen !

Happy Onam everyone.

Yuck

What the heck man ? Whats with Dubai and Ed Hardy, YUCK ! I just went to Karama Center and its EVERYWHERE ! and the worst part is its all cheap. Lol, funny how they made an expensive product Cheap.

Never will I buy anything Ed Hardy, its so crap.
OOooH I found these awesome purple checkZ pants I'm thinking of buying ! :D !

I'm trying to make up a new outfit..rawr...
Anywho, I'll blog more later.

Hi...

Hi ! Well, today is going to be 'finish all assignments' day !! And I am going to try and finish all assignments !!!

And also...

• Give a brief review about my gear I use.
• Rant about life.

Stay tuned :D !